Hey everybody!...of late I have given much thought over this word "Patriarchal Society". Dictionary.com explains the word "patriarchal" as the male head of a family or tribal line.
I belong to such a society. I have been raised as a part of it. I respect my father over anybody else. Now there...what does this statement of mine mean?...Does that mean I respect my mother lesser than my father...of course not!! Since my childhood, I never gave it an iota of my attention. Then why mull over it now? Didn't I just accept all the decisions made by my father right since the very beginning...yes I did...Does that mean I conform to the norms of a "patriarchal set up"? umm..well..yes..I did...initially...when I couldn't understand or rather didn't have an idea about either patriarchal or matriarchal as ideologies. Now, when I'm educated enough to understand these words and their implications, what change has it brought to my life as a whole? Nothing! Does that mean I have conformed to the age old setup? I would like to word the answer differently. I've been fortunate enough to be educated to voice my opinion and be in an environment where I can voice my opinion! Does this hold true for everybody? I'm afraid not!!
People of such societies have often misused their positions in the garb of belonging to a patriarchal set up. I still very vividly remember a few incidents which happened in succession while I was training to be a gynecologist in India. I saw a few cases where the woman of the house was almost reduced to a mangled mass post delivery or during an unsterile attempt to abort a pregnancy at home. We as a team saved many but there were quite a few complicated cases where nothing could be done and the patient died a painful death! I as a junior in the department was appalled to see this status of theirs. I talked to many a male member of the patient's family to know why this happened? They were surprisingly quite proud to announce that they as males take the decision of what to do about the health status of the females in the family. They decide when they are to be taken to a hospital, whether they are to be taken even or not!! Does this justify a so called "patriarchal set up"? I'm afraid, it doesn't!
Does the above account mean by setting up a matriarchal society all problems will come to an end? No, they won't. I saw that education was an important issue to tackle while solving this dilemma. However, I know of many situations when even educated people don't realise that everybody has a right to speak up for themselves. All it calls from us, the young generation, if I may say so, is to make sure that every individual, male or female is able to express and exercise his/her rights. He/ she doesn't hesitate in speaking up when they are being wronged. Once this happens, it would be immaterial whether the society is "patriarchal" or "matriarchal".
Is that too much to ask for? Is it so unaccessible a dream?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
In the words of Steven Goldberg (author of Why Men Rule), "I believe the evidence indicates that women follow their own psychophysiological imperatives and that they would not choose to compete for the goals that men devote their lives to attaining. Women have more important things to do. Men are aware of this and that is why in this and every other society they look to women for gentleness, kindness, and love, for refuge from a world of pain and force, for safety from their own excesses. In every society a basic male motivation is the feeling that the women and children must be protected. But a woman cannot have it both ways: if she wishes to sacrifice all this, what she will get in return is the right to meet men on male terms. She will lose."
Wow!! That was quite a comment!! "She will lose". Lose in what? I'm afraid to say unfortunately you have got it all wrong! If you read the post very carefully, and may I say, without bias/prejudice, you will see my post mentions the desire to express and exercise the right to voice one's opinion!! It also says that holds true for both men and women!! Now, I wonder where does the question of loss arises!! Is it so difficult for a male to understand that it's not about protection so congenially offered by men...It's rather about the freedom for everybody to express one's desire!! This doesn't mean that "women" will not do the more important things she does as mentioned in the above comment. I would respectfully disagree with the following statement - "I believe the evidence indicates that women follow their own psychophysiological imperatives and that they would not choose to compete for the goals that men devote their lives to attaining". Do you really think that the women I mentioned in my post "choose" not to voice their opinion or "choose" not to be educated? No!! The proud announcement by the "male head" that they choose what happens to the women is actually the bitter truth!! I would like to say that "the basic male motivation is the feeling that the women and children must be protected" wasn't really followed here!!
Of course I was mentioning all this to Mr. Goldberg...but through you...coz You brought forth Mr. Goldberg's comments to this post!!
The particular problem that you mentioned in your article is not due to a patriarchal system. This is more due to lack of awareness. In the situation you mentioned, let us suppose for a moment there that it was a matriarchal system then what is the guarantee that women wouldn't have tried to do the same stuff by themselves?
You are right that there are a lot of places in the world today where women don't have a say in the family/society but what you fail to see is the fact that things have improved over the past significantly, and it'll continue to improve. We cannot change the society in a day but yes, we can definitely try to ensure that our children don't go through the same problem.
I never said society can be changed in a day! Did I? I addressed this issue also that just by making the society "matriarchal" won't solve the problem!! The lack of awareness is definitely there..I do agree...but the answers given to me by the "male" member of the family of the patient is not just lack of awareness...it's the obstinate and quite arrogant attitude by virtue of belonging to a "patriarchal" set up and its consequences being suffered by the female patient is what had bothered me...and I endeavoured to put some light to it through my post!
And I am trying to say that even that particular male who boisterously and arrogantly stated that the males had taken the decision for the females in their family is not to be blamed. Why? Simply because he has grown up believing in that system. Add to that ignorance and lack of education. What do you get? You get someone like that guy.
I guess I was trying to address the problem of this "system" only "which he has grown up believing in". I already have addressed all these issues subtly in my original post! However, I would reiterate that just by saying "he believes in it" isn't enough..To quote from my original post "All it calls from us, the young generation, if I may say so, is to make sure that every individual, male or female is able to express and exercise his/her rights. He/ she doesn't hesitate in speaking up when they are being wronged".
Post a Comment